Canard Conspiracy

This bird flu thing? It's a conspiracy. It's true.
But not from the standard conspiracists this time.

Now it's even much more KFC than JFK.
Yup, it's the birds. Birds are conspiring against us. Well, not us.
Not yet. Right now it's the first line of offense to birds: Felines
and Foreigners. And they're attacking both of them!

Both felines and foreigners have been known to attack, kill, and hang
in windows all kids of birds since the beginning of time. The birds
have done nothing to provoke this attack other than simply having
feathers and sporting the ability to fly. Oh, and that dangerous beak.

So this whole bird-flu is their way of getting back at us and 'them"
for all the horrible treatment they've been getting all these years.

The dodo, the chicken-crossing-street jokes, "bird-brain", and
penned-in hunting has caught up with us. We're going to pay for our
terra-firma-centric lifestyles. The chicken has come home to roost; in
the closest comparison to literality since we devised that clever
saying.

Look to the skies, my friends.
For we may truly have egg on our face.