Curiously Strong Paychecks
Clearly there at a lot of people being over-paid.
If you have the time and money to turn an iPod Shuffle into an Altoids can you're obviously valued more than you're worth. This specific case may be an exception as the person labels it as a "dead" shuffle. But nonetheless, that's at the very best a $70 Altoids container.
Do you know one of those types of people? You know the kind. The people that have two of everything that Apple makes the day they're released, a half-dozen PCs through-out their house, a couple TiVo and Netflicks accounts, Satellite, HDTV, and complains that the HiDef 60" Plasma in their recroom is better than the two they have in their basement?
They're easy to find. They're in your tech department at work or most likely every VP or Marketing Dept. Head. The real-estate guy you see advertised on bus-shelters? Yeah, he's one of them. The jackass who parked his Jetta over three spaces? Yup, him too.
Most notably is anyone who is, or knows, Kevin Rose.
If you've been in the same room as that guy, you now have all of the products listed above. If your voice has been heard on the podcast "TWiT", you have double that amount.
What I hate most about these types of people is their lack of knowledge of what it's like to work for the money. Now, I'm sure they work relatively hard for the things they horde. But at this point, they don't need to work. They could easily stop working for the next decade and live more comfortably than the rest of us. Well, there'd be one caveat: they'd no longer get to buy new shit each week.
That daily iPod purchase and the new car for the months ending in "R" would have to come to a stop. They'd have to live like the rest of us screw-ups: one DVD player at a time.
I don't begrudge them their winnings. I know I'd conspicuously consume with the best of them if I had that mad dotcom money. But I have neither the marketing talents nor lack of morals to jump into that clusterfunk.
Treat yourself. Some Saturday pretend you're one of these cash-sponge monkeys and take a trip to the local BestBuy. Walk to a salesperson and command his/her attention. Wave your hand across the sales-room floor in a grand gesture and in a booming voice say to the nice clerk, "I'll take it! Every god-damned piece of it."
Yes, every fucking piece of it.
If you have the time and money to turn an iPod Shuffle into an Altoids can you're obviously valued more than you're worth. This specific case may be an exception as the person labels it as a "dead" shuffle. But nonetheless, that's at the very best a $70 Altoids container.
Do you know one of those types of people? You know the kind. The people that have two of everything that Apple makes the day they're released, a half-dozen PCs through-out their house, a couple TiVo and Netflicks accounts, Satellite, HDTV, and complains that the HiDef 60" Plasma in their recroom is better than the two they have in their basement?
They're easy to find. They're in your tech department at work or most likely every VP or Marketing Dept. Head. The real-estate guy you see advertised on bus-shelters? Yeah, he's one of them. The jackass who parked his Jetta over three spaces? Yup, him too.
Most notably is anyone who is, or knows, Kevin Rose.
If you've been in the same room as that guy, you now have all of the products listed above. If your voice has been heard on the podcast "TWiT", you have double that amount.
What I hate most about these types of people is their lack of knowledge of what it's like to work for the money. Now, I'm sure they work relatively hard for the things they horde. But at this point, they don't need to work. They could easily stop working for the next decade and live more comfortably than the rest of us. Well, there'd be one caveat: they'd no longer get to buy new shit each week.
That daily iPod purchase and the new car for the months ending in "R" would have to come to a stop. They'd have to live like the rest of us screw-ups: one DVD player at a time.
I don't begrudge them their winnings. I know I'd conspicuously consume with the best of them if I had that mad dotcom money. But I have neither the marketing talents nor lack of morals to jump into that clusterfunk.
Treat yourself. Some Saturday pretend you're one of these cash-sponge monkeys and take a trip to the local BestBuy. Walk to a salesperson and command his/her attention. Wave your hand across the sales-room floor in a grand gesture and in a booming voice say to the nice clerk, "I'll take it! Every god-damned piece of it."
Yes, every fucking piece of it.
4 Comments:
I don't actually know these people... I guess that's what I get for working at a homeless shelter in a small city.
Whoa! Easy there chief :p
I know, I know. But some day, you'll find your calling - something so ridiculously simple, yet addictive for everyone else, that they can't help but to give you their hard-earned cash for it. Crack is a good start. But you can do better than that.
Everyone has a calling. When you settle down for a moment - hell, take 10 days at one of those mountain retreats if you have to - let your instinct tells you what that calling is.
Some may mistakingly think it's the first urge they get when they see pretty women on TV. Many of us go through life with multiple 'false-callings' and 'reborn-as-a-fill-in-the-blank'. What really matters, is that you are happily doing your shit.
That way, even if it is not your calling, you are at least happy doing it.
That's why porn stars really don't care what the next scene involve.
The crack helps, of course.
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