We Be Dumb

Here's a thought: Every last human on this planet is an idiot. Despite education, Nobel Prizes, cures for disease, and vast advancements in technology and way-of-life we are all fundamentally stupid.

Please hear this out. This not another diatribe from soap-box on high. Instead it's a general statement, which includes the author in its' thesis.

We are all born equal. This is a universally known fact. Well, okay, it's a fact known globally. A few individuals on a planet in the far reaches of this Universe haven't quite came to grasp this idea. But that's beside the point.

What this means, is that from birth, we are all simply a handful of imbeciles running about trying our best not to die too early.

Everything we do in life are small examples of us trying to hide this very obvious fact. Education, learning, and so forth aren't there to better ourselves. They're just there to hide the fact we're morons.

How do I know this? Because we are all plagued by the same symptoms. We've all stared blankly into an open fridge without moving for long stretches of time. We're all equally paralyzed by choice as we vacantly pace the aisles of Blockbuster, unable to decide between equal levels of mediocrity.

Have you ever politely followed the opening instructions on a box of Junior Mints; turning it over to the appropriate side? Have you ever been caught in the 'Chinese Finger Trap' -like torture of opening a plastic baggy at the supermarket? Have you ever stepped into an elevator only to push the call button for the floor you're currently on?

All of the above are examples of when all of our education fails us and are brought crashing downing to a simple, equal level. The true idiot.

The next time you push a 'pull' door, jam the car-keys into the lock of your front door, or curse at an inanimate object; don't feel foolish. Instead, step back, smile and enjoy the small moment at which we all become equal. We're all an idiot sometimes.